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Friday, May 6, 2011

I know what I need...and I need it fast.

There is nothing better than having that person that you can call when it’s absolutely urgent to get fucked and you know it will just rock your world. The person who knows you don’t want to change anything else about what you are doing except meeting in a seedy bar and going in their car and banging it out. The sex is so incredible that you have to just call them in the middle of the night for an emergency orgasm. It is so fucking amazing that no matter who you are dating, if you are in a commitment, or you are just single...you need it and you need it fast.

Who doesn’t want that unattached sex that blows your mind...the sex that when you walk in the door it is fucking on and both of you are so fucking impatient you can’t even get all your clothing off. You can call them anytime, anywhere and you know that there will be hot sweaty sex without any strings attached.

Everybody needs that person and should have that person right now. You need to have that dirty slut or hot fucker that you barely know who can fuck you like nobody else can. No love making, no meeting the fucking parents, and absolutely no romance. I am talking hot and heavy sex when you want it and as fast as it can happen. No strings attached...just good and marinated and ready to go.

I know several people that have this person...and often change this person up from time to time. This person shouldn’t be somebody you would take home to mom or somebody you travel in the same social circle with. This person needs to be good looking, has all the right equipment, and knows how to shut their fucking trap. They also need to have reliable transportation so when you want it...you can get it. Trust me from experience...a fucking skateboard just isn’t going to get it done.

This isn’t a one night stand, this isn’t a friend with benefits situation, and this isn’t a fucking relationship whatsoever. This is a fucking booty call on goddamn
steroids! This is kind of like a reliable cell phone, a stiff martini, an good line of cocaine, and a hot shower... everybody needs one and it has to be quality.

Stop fucking that person that just doesn’t get it done! If you do find the person that does get you off...it doesn’t always mean you need to have a relationship with them. Sometimes a good fuck when you need it is a perfectly good relationship.

Start tonight. Go out there and find that person who makes you fucking crazy horny.

Remember...you don’t want this person so perfect that you will eventually want more than just an urgent telephone call in the middle of the night. You want them dirty, sexy, and to make you fucking cum like nobody else can...even if it is in a porta potty. Hey...I am not one to judge...trust me.

This is making me crazy...time to dial my booty call on steroids.